1/ All computer hackers’ computers come pre-fitted with a bunch of C4 explosives inside

2/ Governments know when their systems have been infiltrated, because all monitors turn off momentarily.

3/ On the other hand, a hackers’ monitor merely buzzes in and out of phase when something nasty has happened on his setup.

4/ The standard ‘hacker’ way of restoring normality to his system, hiding and encrypting all his files, and generally making everything good again can be achieved by pressing the ‘Del’ key. Bear in mind that this is a ‘bad idea’ if your computer happens to be fitted with 1/ and has just experienced 3/

5/ ‘Hacking’ involves pressing very few keys on your keyboard, and lots of progress bars and scrolling logfiles on a screen.

6/ It’s possible for a heat-seeking air-to-ground missile to miss a large heat source, like a truck’s engine and running gear, and to hit a concrete pillar instead.

7/ It’s possible for the pillar hit in 6/ to set off a chain reaction of what appears to be exploding pillars which bring down a motorway/freeway.

8/ No one in the entire East of the USA has any form of power backup, generators or UPS systems, apart from one hacker, who is “runnin’ 5 generators” to keep his “control centre” alive.

9/ Hackers always have magic publically routable RFC1918 IP addresses.

10/ Hackers don’t attempt to disguise their identity and running a simple WHOIS-like tool on that RFC1918 address brings up their real name.

11/ It’s possible to contact an F35 fighter plane pilot whilst impersonating military air traffic control, whilst all cellular, satellite and land-based telecommunications are down from a laptop inside of your Mercedes Benz van doing 50mph down the freeway.

12/ It’s possible for the entire financial data of every individual citizen, company and government department of the United States of America to be ‘downloaded’ onto a USB-connected disk.

13/ It’s possible for BMW to know when the airbags have been deployed in one of their cars, and in the event of such – they will open up communications with that car and enquire if the occupants are OK.

14/ Also, BMW are able to do 13/ even when the entire USA’s communications infrastructure is completely down.

15/ And, as a result of 13/ BMW will be able to start that car up remotely, without requiring anything so 20th century as a key.

16/ No one in America turns their car lights on when in a dark, unlit, tunnel. Not even owners of cars which automatically sense this. Crazy.

17/ In order for hackers to shut down a ‘power hub’, and plunge the entire Eastern USA into darkness you need to have a person on-site. Except when that plan goes wrong, anyhow, and then hackers can just reroute lots of gas to the station and everything blows up anyhow.

18/ The next time I need to fend off a helicopter gunman that’s chasing me – I’ll drive over a fire hydrant. The resulting jet of water will quickly take care of any machine-gun wielding maniacs.

Other than that…. grrrrrrrreat film.

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